When Work Becomes Unbearable: Should You Quit or Stay?

There comes a point in some jobs when Sunday evening starts feeling like a warning. You dread opening your inbox, avoid certain colleagues and spend your commute wondering whether today will finally be the day you resign. When work reaches that stage, walking away can feel like the obvious solution.

But resigning is a significant decision, particularly when the workplace itself may be contributing to the problem. In some circumstances, an employee may believe they’ve effectively been forced to resign because of their employer’s conduct — a situation sometimes associated with constructive dismissal. The legal meaning and requirements vary between jurisdictions, so anyone concerned about their employment rights should obtain advice relevant to their particular circumstances before making assumptions.

For everyone else, the question remains: when a job becomes miserable, is it better to leave or try to fix the situation first?

Work Out What’s Actually Making You Want to Leave

“I hate my job” describes how you feel, but it doesn’t identify the problem.

Try breaking the situation down.

Is the issue:

• One difficult manager?
• Unmanageable workloads?
• Bullying or inappropriate behaviour?
• Poor pay?
• Constant unpaid or excessive hours?
• A toxic team culture?
• A sudden change to your role?
• No opportunity to progress?
• Something temporary, such as a particularly difficult project?

Identifying the actual problem helps you decide whether it can realistically be fixed.

If you enjoy the role but can’t work effectively with one manager, for example, an internal transfer might solve the problem. If the entire organisation operates in a way you fundamentally dislike, changing teams probably won’t.

Don’t Resign During Your Worst Five Minutes

You’ve just left a terrible meeting. Your manager embarrassed you in front of everyone. You’re furious.

This is probably not the ideal moment to write a resignation email.

Even when leaving ultimately proves to be the right decision, give yourself enough time to think clearly. Resigning can affect your income, benefits, references and potential legal options.

Go home, write down what happened and revisit the decision once the immediate anger has passed.

There are exceptions, particularly where your immediate safety is at risk. But in ordinary workplace disputes, a considered decision is usually better than an impulsive exit.

Consider Whether the Problem Can Be Fixed

Not every bad workplace situation requires resignation.

If the issue is something your employer could reasonably address, consider whether you’ve given them an opportunity to do so.

Depending on the circumstances, that might involve speaking with your manager, contacting HR, using a formal grievance procedure or requesting practical changes.

Be specific about the problem.

Saying “this workplace is toxic” may communicate your frustration, but it doesn’t tell anyone what needs to change. Explaining that you’ve been assigned repeated deadlines that require significantly more hours than are available gives the employer something concrete to address.

Keep Useful Records

If the situation is serious, keep factual records of important events.

That might include relevant emails, meeting notes, rosters, payslips, performance reviews or copies of complaints you’re lawfully entitled to retain.

Write down dates, what occurred and who was present.

Avoid secretly taking confidential company information or recording conversations without understanding the applicable laws.

Good records aren’t only useful in legal disputes. They can help you determine whether things are genuinely getting worse or whether one particularly unpleasant incident is dominating your perception of the job.

Look at Your Financial Position

Sometimes leaving is the right choice, but that doesn’t make rent disappear next month.

Before resigning without another job lined up, work out how long you could realistically manage without your regular income.

Consider your:

• Savings
• Essential monthly expenses
• Debt repayments
• Insurance or benefits connected to employment
• Notice obligations
• Likely time required to find another position

This isn’t an argument for staying indefinitely in a terrible job. It’s about making your exit sustainable rather than replacing workplace stress with immediate financial stress.

Be Careful If You Feel You’re Being Forced Out

Sometimes employees don’t simply dislike their jobs. They believe their employer is deliberately making continued employment impossible.

Perhaps important responsibilities have suddenly been removed. Working conditions have changed dramatically. Serious complaints are being ignored. Or the employee feels they’re being pressured to resign rather than being formally dismissed.

These situations can be legally complicated.

Don’t assume that writing “you forced me to resign” in your resignation letter automatically establishes a legal claim. Equally, don’t assume you have no options because technically you were the person who resigned.

If serious employer conduct is driving your decision, consider obtaining independent advice before leaving where practical. Timing, evidence and the precise circumstances can matter.

Ask Yourself What Staying Would Need to Look Like

Instead of asking only, “Should I quit?”, ask another question:

“What would have to change for me to genuinely want to stay?”

Maybe you need a manageable workload, a different reporting structure or a clear response to a complaint.

Then consider whether those changes are realistic.

If you’ve raised the same issue repeatedly for a year and nothing has happened, promising yourself that things will somehow improve next month may simply delay an inevitable decision.

On the other hand, if the problem is recent and your employer is genuinely working to address it, staying a little longer may be worthwhile.

Leave With a Plan, Not Just an Escape Route

Sometimes the healthiest career decision is to move on. Other times, a difficult workplace situation can be improved without giving up a job you otherwise value.

The key is to avoid treating resignation as the only way to regain control.

Identify what’s actually wrong. Document serious problems. Use appropriate workplace processes where sensible. Understand your financial position and, if you believe your employer’s conduct may have legal implications, get advice before making an irreversible decision.

Leaving a bad job can feel like an enormous relief. It’s even better when you’re leaving because you’ve made a considered decision about what comes next — not simply because one terrible day pushed you out the door.